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    Asura's Specials

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    Asura
    Jounin

    Posts : 18
    Join date : 2017-10-01

    Asura's Specials

    Post by Asura on Sun Nov 05, 2017 7:35 pm

    Name: Blitz Parade
    Rank: A
    Power: A
    Activation Cost:
    Upkeep Cost: 10
    Range: N/A
    Speed: N/A
    Element:
    Skill: Taijutsu
    Classification:
    Requirements: B-Rank Speed
    Parent Technique: N/A
    Hand Seals: N/A
    Description: The user focuses their chakra on increasing their speed for a single combo, adding 1 tier++ to Speed for this technique.  This combo begins with a strike to the front of the enemies torso, hitting directly in the diaphragm.  After this, the user quickly moves around the target, striking from a different spot around them.  This can be from the side, back, or even from above if the user is fast enough.  If multiple opponents are close together, than the user can choose to switch between opponents rather than striking the same opponents multiple times.  The maximum range for this target switching is 1 meter for B Rank speed, 3 meters for A-Rank, and 5 meters for S-Rank and above.

    Weaknesses:  The technique is draining if used continuously, and can't be used over a great distance.  Because of this, if the target is able to get away in the first post, then the jutsu cannot usually be used effectively.  It also doesn't increase strength like many other taijutsu, meaning that if the user is weak, than the strikes will still not be very damaging.


    Last edited by Asura on Sun Nov 12, 2017 2:22 pm; edited 7 times in total


    _________________
    Me:
    Character Name: Asura
    Spendable Experience: 260
    Total Experience: 4100
    Renown: 0
    Ryo: 50,000

    Bloodline: Swift Release

    Elements: Wind

    Skills]
    Chemistry
    Genjutsu
    Taijutsu

    [b]Stats:

    [/b]

    • Strength: D
    • Constitution: C
    • Stamina: C
    • Speed: B
    • Coordination: C
    • Intelligence: B
    • Perception: C



    [b]Limit Break Points:

    [/b]

    • Physical: 2
    • Technique: 0
    • Destiny: 1



    [b]Link to Character Updates:
    Asura
    Link to Character Application:
    Link to Known Techniques:
    -----------------[/b]
    avatar
    Akame
    Anbu

    Posts : 660
    Join date : 2016-12-15

    Character File
    Skills & Elements: None
    Class: A
    Ryo:

    Re: Asura's Specials

    Post by Akame on Sun Nov 05, 2017 10:08 pm

    Hmmm, alright, so this lists Swift Release as a requirement but Wind as the element. If it requires the Swift element, then you can remove that from requirements and put it into the element slot. If it doesn't require Swift Release, then I'm unsure why this has an element at all. The description of the technique reads more like a taijutsu technique, though if you need to be using the Swift Release kekkei genkai beforehand I can understand it being a nintaijutsu.

    Depending on if this is a nintaijutsu or a regular taijutsu, the cost for that single tier boost can be either 5 or 3 respectively. The upkeep can be 3 for both circumstances, there's no need to keep increasing the costs every round. Since the technique mentions being able to strike multiple targets, I'm going to need to ask you to put a definite range in here as well for the sake of determining how many people in an area may be struck with this in one post.


    _________________
    Spoiler:
    Character Name: Akame Sasumi
    Experience:  0/4200
    Renown: 3000
    Ryo: 0
    Stats:

    • Strength: C
    • Constitution: D
    • Stamina: B
    • Speed: C
    • Coordination: B
    • Intelligence: A
    • Perception: B


    Limit Break Points:

    • Physical: 2
    • Technique: 0
    • Destiny: 1

    Link to Character Updates: http://gladiusrp.forumotion.com/t219-tsuyo-s-updates#1371






    "Death comes for everyone. I'm just moving you to the front of the line."

    Asura
    Jounin

    Posts : 18
    Join date : 2017-10-01

    Re: Asura's Specials

    Post by Asura on Tue Nov 07, 2017 11:03 pm

    Fixed right on up


    _________________
    Me:
    Character Name: Asura
    Spendable Experience: 260
    Total Experience: 4100
    Renown: 0
    Ryo: 50,000

    Bloodline: Swift Release

    Elements: Wind

    Skills]
    Chemistry
    Genjutsu
    Taijutsu

    [b]Stats:

    [/b]

    • Strength: D
    • Constitution: C
    • Stamina: C
    • Speed: B
    • Coordination: C
    • Intelligence: B
    • Perception: C



    [b]Limit Break Points:

    [/b]

    • Physical: 2
    • Technique: 0
    • Destiny: 1



    [b]Link to Character Updates:
    Asura
    Link to Character Application:
    Link to Known Techniques:
    -----------------[/b]
    avatar
    Akame
    Anbu

    Posts : 660
    Join date : 2016-12-15

    Character File
    Skills & Elements: None
    Class: A
    Ryo:

    Re: Asura's Specials

    Post by Akame on Wed Nov 08, 2017 5:17 pm

    Since this requires Swift Release, that makes it a nintaijutsu and the activation will need to be 5. Either that, or take out Swift Release as the element and keep it as regular taijutsu. For consistency, make the range 2 meters please.


    _________________
    Spoiler:
    Character Name: Akame Sasumi
    Experience:  0/4200
    Renown: 3000
    Ryo: 0
    Stats:

    • Strength: C
    • Constitution: D
    • Stamina: B
    • Speed: C
    • Coordination: B
    • Intelligence: A
    • Perception: B


    Limit Break Points:

    • Physical: 2
    • Technique: 0
    • Destiny: 1

    Link to Character Updates: http://gladiusrp.forumotion.com/t219-tsuyo-s-updates#1371






    "Death comes for everyone. I'm just moving you to the front of the line."

    Asura
    Jounin

    Posts : 18
    Join date : 2017-10-01

    Re: Asura's Specials

    Post by Asura on Thu Nov 09, 2017 10:28 am

    Fixed


    _________________
    Me:
    Character Name: Asura
    Spendable Experience: 260
    Total Experience: 4100
    Renown: 0
    Ryo: 50,000

    Bloodline: Swift Release

    Elements: Wind

    Skills]
    Chemistry
    Genjutsu
    Taijutsu

    [b]Stats:

    [/b]

    • Strength: D
    • Constitution: C
    • Stamina: C
    • Speed: B
    • Coordination: C
    • Intelligence: B
    • Perception: C



    [b]Limit Break Points:

    [/b]

    • Physical: 2
    • Technique: 0
    • Destiny: 1



    [b]Link to Character Updates:
    Asura
    Link to Character Application:
    Link to Known Techniques:
    -----------------[/b]
    avatar
    Masuyo Kaede
    Jounin

    Posts : 905
    Join date : 2016-12-07

    Character File
    Skills & Elements: Fire | Earth | Wind | Bukijutsu | Ninjutsu | Taijutsu
    Class: A
    Ryo: 30,000

    Re: Asura's Specials

    Post by Masuyo Kaede on Thu Nov 09, 2017 4:44 pm

    @Asura wrote:Name: Blitz Parade
    Rank: A
    Power: A
    Activation Cost: 3
    Upkeep Cost: 3
    Range: N/A
    Speed: N/A
    Element:
    Skill: Taijutsu
    Classification:
    Requirements: B-Rank Speed
    Parent Technique: N/A
    Hand Seals: N/A
    Description: The user focuses their chakra on increasing their speed for a single combo, adding 1 tier to Speed for this technique.  This combo begins with a strike to the front of the enemies torso, hitting directly in the diaphragm.  After this, the user quickly moves around the target, striking from a different spot around them.  This can be from the side, back, or even from above if the user is fast enough.  Using this technique, the user can throw 5 hits per post, and continue the jutsu for up to 4 rounds, with the upkeep increasing by 5 per post.  If multiple opponents are close together, than the user can choose to switch between opponents rather than striking the same opponents multiple times.  The maximum range for this target switching is 2 meters per post.

    Weaknesses:  The technique is draining if used continuously, and can't be used over a distance.  Because of this, if the target is able to get away in the first post, then the jutsu cannot usually be used effectively.  It also doesn't increase strength like many other taijutsu, meaning that if the user is weak, than the strikes will still not be very damaging.


    "Using this technique, the user can throw 5 hits per post, and continue the jutsu for up to 4 rounds, with the upkeep increasing by 5 per post. "

    This represents a different value than the one you have mentioned above.



    I couldn't help but notice this technique only grants a +1 tier buff, which is equivalent to a C-rank technique. There's no reason why this needs to be an A-rank technique. You also have a few things that make the technique weaker than it should be, such as the post limit and the cap on how many strikes you can do per post, and the 2 meter gap deal. You can freely remove those limitations.


    _________________
    Strength: C+
    Constitution: B
    Stamina: B
    Speed: A
    Coordination: A
    Intelligence: B
    Perception: A

    Spoiler:


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      Front Holster
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      Back Holster
    • 10 Shuriken
      Right Hip Pouch
    • 15 Kunai
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    • 150 ft. Steel Wire
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    • 20 Military Ration Pills
    • Bandage Wrap
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    • 15 Kunai
    • 3 Flash Bombs
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      Flak Jacket Scroll Holster
    • Small Sealed Weapon Scroll



    Character Updates

    Asura
    Jounin

    Posts : 18
    Join date : 2017-10-01

    Re: Asura's Specials

    Post by Asura on Sun Nov 12, 2017 11:58 am

    Fixed (I think)
    Forgot to remove that bit about the cost back when I changed it


    _________________
    Me:
    Character Name: Asura
    Spendable Experience: 260
    Total Experience: 4100
    Renown: 0
    Ryo: 50,000

    Bloodline: Swift Release

    Elements: Wind

    Skills]
    Chemistry
    Genjutsu
    Taijutsu

    [b]Stats:

    [/b]

    • Strength: D
    • Constitution: C
    • Stamina: C
    • Speed: B
    • Coordination: C
    • Intelligence: B
    • Perception: C



    [b]Limit Break Points:

    [/b]

    • Physical: 2
    • Technique: 0
    • Destiny: 1



    [b]Link to Character Updates:
    Asura
    Link to Character Application:
    Link to Known Techniques:
    -----------------[/b]
    avatar
    The Founder
    Admin

    Posts : 661
    Join date : 2012-05-28

    Character File
    Skills & Elements: All
    Class: X
    Ryo: All of It

    Re: Asura's Specials

    Post by The Founder on Sun Nov 12, 2017 12:46 pm

    Blitz Parade- You describe a range for target switching without any real parameters. "However far the user can continue the combo" could be anywhere from two inches to thirty kilometers, depending on what you consider a continuation to be. Within arm's reach, or about a meter, would be fine, since this is Taijutsu.

    "1++" isn't a term for boosting. You could say "1 Tier++" or "2+" or "++". I'm guessing you were going for "1 Tier++", which is an A-Rank boost, and that means that the cost of this combo will need to increase to B-Rank levels, that is, 10 pts for Activation or for Upkeep. Since this is a one-shot combo that can potentially switch between targets, you'll be fine just making it have one Activation cost and skipping the upkeep. This doesn't seem like the sort of technique that can be continued indefinitely, though if it can, then you can ditch the Activation cost and just keep the Upkeep cost. Whichever one you keep will need to be 10 pts, if you want to keep that 1 Tier++ boost.

    Any boosting technique can take a stat above S-Tier. The limits to boosting are 2 Tiers above your base stat when using Generic Boosters, like this custom, and S-Tier++ for all boosters, since only specific things can take a stat to X-Tier or above. So that last line in the Description is unnecessary.

    Asura
    Jounin

    Posts : 18
    Join date : 2017-10-01

    Re: Asura's Specials

    Post by Asura on Mon Nov 13, 2017 11:53 am

    Fixed


    _________________
    Me:
    Character Name: Asura
    Spendable Experience: 260
    Total Experience: 4100
    Renown: 0
    Ryo: 50,000

    Bloodline: Swift Release

    Elements: Wind

    Skills]
    Chemistry
    Genjutsu
    Taijutsu

    [b]Stats:

    [/b]

    • Strength: D
    • Constitution: C
    • Stamina: C
    • Speed: B
    • Coordination: C
    • Intelligence: B
    • Perception: C



    [b]Limit Break Points:

    [/b]

    • Physical: 2
    • Technique: 0
    • Destiny: 1



    [b]Link to Character Updates:
    Asura
    Link to Character Application:
    Link to Known Techniques:
    -----------------[/b]
    avatar
    The Founder
    Admin

    Posts : 661
    Join date : 2012-05-28

    Character File
    Skills & Elements: All
    Class: X
    Ryo: All of It

    Re: Asura's Specials

    Post by The Founder on Mon Nov 13, 2017 6:53 pm

    @Asura wrote:
    Spoiler:
    Name: Blitz Parade
    Rank: A
    Power: A
    Activation Cost:
    Upkeep Cost: 10
    Range: N/A
    Speed: N/A
    Element:
    Skill: Taijutsu
    Classification:
    Requirements: B-Rank Speed
    Parent Technique: N/A
    Hand Seals: N/A
    Description: The user focuses their chakra on increasing their speed for a single combo, adding 1 tier++ to Speed for this technique.  This combo begins with a strike to the front of the enemies torso, hitting directly in the diaphragm.  After this, the user quickly moves around the target, striking from a different spot around them.  This can be from the side, back, or even from above if the user is fast enough.  If multiple opponents are close together, than the user can choose to switch between opponents rather than striking the same opponents multiple times.  The maximum range for this target switching is 1 meter for B Rank speed, 3 meters for A-Rank, and 5 meters for S-Rank and above.

    Weaknesses:  The technique is draining if used continuously, and can't be used over a great distance.  Because of this, if the target is able to get away in the first post, then the jutsu cannot usually be used effectively.  It also doesn't increase strength like many other taijutsu, meaning that if the user is weak, than the strikes will still not be very damaging.
    Approved.

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    Re: Asura's Specials

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