Gladius

A free form, text based role playing game based on the universe of the Naruto manga and anime.
 
HomePortalRegisterLog in
After high demand from everyone, we've finally opened a Discord Chat Server for the site! Follow the link and get in touch with everyone: https://discord.gg/gNvU4a6

Share | 
 

 Brute Fist

Go down 
AuthorMessage
Blonde
Chuunin
avatar

Posts : 109
Join date : 2017-11-15

Character File
Skills & Elements: Raiton, Chemistry
Class: C
Ryo: 8,700

PostSubject: Brute Fist   Mon Nov 20, 2017 3:53 pm

Name: Chikushou no Ken [畜生拳 lit. Brute Fist]
Rank: C
Power: C
Activation Cost: N/A
Upkeep Cost: 3
Range: Self
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Taijutsu
Classification: Kirigakure Exclusive Style
Requirements: Taijutsu skill, D-Rank in Coordination & Speed
Parent Technique: N/A
Hand Seals: N/A
Description: This fighting style focuses on exploiting the target's weak spots, and attacking with raw power and speed. The style is occasionally used in tandem with Ninjutsu created to be befitting of it. This fighting style boosts the user's Strength by ++ and their Speed by a +.
Weaknesses: If an opponent has countermethods to the especially-pinpoint fighting style, it's fairly difficult to pull off within combat.

Name: Quick Step
Rank: D
Power: D
Activation Cost: 1
Upkeep Cost: N/A
Range: Self
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Ninjutsu
Classification: N/A
Requirements: N/A
Parent Technique: Chikushou no Ken
Hand Seals: Chikushou no Ken
Description: More or less a technique used for supplementary means, the Quick Step sticks true to its name. Through the combined use of the Surface Walking technique, albeit in a unique use, and proper positioning of their foot, the user is able to capitalize on the flow of chakra to their sole, using it as a means to propel themselves forward in a quick burst, simultaneously kicking off with the foot they've just lifted the heel of, for a brief propulsion. ++ to Speed for the duration.
Weaknesses: N/A

Name: Mirage Step
Rank: C
Power: C
Activation Cost: 5
Upkeep Cost: N/A
Range: Self
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Ninjutsu
Classification: N/A
Requirements: N/A
Parent Technique: Chikushou no Ken, Clone Technique
Hand Seals: Ram → Snake → Tiger
Description: After forming the handseals pertaining to the Clone Technique, the user amps it up. Whether sprinting, jogging or even sauntering, they employ the academy technique in the form of a consistent trail of afterimages behind them, mirroring the movements of the creator, but doing nothing else aside from that. When used by someone with incredible speed, the technique becomes especially effective, as they can cloak themselves in a consistent "stream" of afterimages. For every 3 chakra used, five afterimages are created, and last within the post they're created.
Weaknesses: Easily distinguishable with doujutsu or sensory. Additionally, if the opponent's Perception can track the user's Speed, they're able to distinguish the real user from the afterimages. Additionally, despite making duplicates of the user, these afterimages do not have a physical form.

Name: Nail Claw Transmutation
Rank: C
Power: C
Activation Cost: 5
Upkeep Cost: N/A
Range: Self
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Taijutsu
Classification: N/A
Requirements: N/A
Parent Technique: Chikushou no Ken
Hand Seals: N/A
Description: A technique made to weaponize the user's body. By forcefully widening the tenketsu both hands, especially along their fingers, the user flows a large output of chakra to their digits. This chakra is used to speed up the growth of their nails, similar to what the Needle Jizo technique does with hair. These nails rapidly form and shape into a claw-like nature, used to shred through defenses with sharpness akin to steel.
Weaknesses: N/A

Name: Tearing Tempest
Rank: B
Power: B
Activation Cost: 10
Upkeep Cost: N/A
Range: Refer to Soft Body Manipulation
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Taijutsu
Classification: N/A
Requirements: N/A
Parent Technique: Soft Body Manipulation, Nail Claw Transmutation
Hand Seals: N/A
Description: With the use of the Soft Body Manipulation technique, the user changes the malleability of their body to a consistency similar to rubber. Afterward they speed up the growth rate of their nails, refining them into a knife-like nature with the Nail Claw Transmutation. With the two techniques, the user assails a foe with medium to long-range attacks that can easily vary between swinging their arms about erratically to create a buzzsaw-like defense around them, or even long-range grapples/attacks.
Weaknesses: N/A

Name: Stifled Executioner
Rank: B
Power: B
Activation Cost: 10
Upkeep Cost: 3
Range: Self
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Taijutsu
Classification: N/A
Requirements: C-Rank Coordination
Parent Technique: Chikushou no Ken
Hand Seals: Ram
Description: With refined chakra control, the user coats their feet or any part of their body in chakra, utilizing it as a means to stifle noise made by wherever the chakra is applied. In the case of feet, this technique can easily be used to mask their steps entirely, without worry of moving too quickly while using it, albeit having to maintain the technique.
Weaknesses: N/A

Name: Falsified Death
Rank: B
Power: B
Activation Cost: 15
Upkeep Cost: -
Range: Self
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Taijutsu + Iijutsu
Classification: N/A
Requirements: B-Rank Intelligence & B-Rank Coordination
Parent Technique: Chikushou no Ken
Hand Seals: N/A
Description: Through the use of acupuncture knowledge, the user precisely hits their target in the neck with a pair of senbon, having the capacity to knock them out if they have C or less Constitution for the purpose of enduring the attack. Any means of Constitution above that point just takes it as a standard injury.
Weaknesses: Requires proper positioning. Requires the target to be stationary. Cannot cause instant death like the canon variant if used in that mannerism.

Name: Wrath of the Demon
Rank: A
Power: A
Activation Cost: 15
Upkeep Cost: 5
Range: Self
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Taijutsu
Classification: N/A
Requirements: N/A
Parent Technique: Chikushou no Ken
Hand Seals: N/A
Description: A technique wherein the combined efforts of the user's will and chakra take on the presence of a demon, shrouding their body as an aura. This technique exudes heavy amounts of killing intent, ontop of filling the user with adrenaline. For the duration of it, they attack relentlessly, disregarding friend between foe so long as the former intends to stop them from quenching their bloodthirst. For the duration of the technique, the user acquires ++ to Speed, + to Strength, and ++ to Constitution. This technique takes on the unique trait of allowing a user to fight like they're possessed, causing them to fight on until they're unable to move.

This can only be used once a topic.
Weaknesses: Makes it difficult to perceive friend from foe. Exudes killing intent on anyone around the user, even those that aren't intended for it. Makes the user misjudge their injuries, as most of the time pain will be numbed by rage.

_________________

"If you're doing something for people you care about, then it doesn't matter how hard it is!"
Updates | App
Spoiler:
 


Last edited by Blonde on Tue Dec 26, 2017 5:55 pm; edited 2 times in total
Back to top Go down
Tsuyo

avatar

Posts : 480
Join date : 2016-12-15

Character File
Skills & Elements: None
Class: E
Ryo:

PostSubject: Re: Brute Fist   Mon Nov 20, 2017 5:16 pm

For the future, please try to keep it at three or four techniques a post. This is more to balance the workload on us a bit better. I don't have the time to go over all of these right now, so I'll stick with the main style for now.


Quote :

Name: Shizuka no Ken [静か拳 lit. Quiet Fist]
Rank: C
Power: C
Activation Cost: N/A
Upkeep Cost: 3
Range: Self
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Taijutsu
Classification: Kirigakure Exclusive Style
Requirements: Taijutsu skill, D-Rank in Coordination & Speed
Parent Technique: N/A
Hand Seals: N/A
Description: Directly translating to "Quiet Fist", this fighting style follows the Silent Killing technique Kirigakure's higher-class shinobi are skilled at. Unlike most fighting styles, where packing power behind attacks is optimal, this one primes itself on slaying a foe by exploiting their weak points and attacking to dispatch a foe quickly. These methods are often used with just pure hand-to-hand combat finesse, or even with Ninjutsu thrown into the mix to be more effective. This fighting style boosts the user's Coordination by ++ and their Speed by a +.
Weaknesses: If an opponent has countermethods to the especially-pinpoint fighting style, it's fairly difficult to pull off within combat.


This is worded like it requires Silent Killing, which I feel should not be the case. Mentioning that this style being used in tandem with Silent Killing is what it is meant for is okay, but requiring the technique would make that "Open" tag somewhat of a lie. You can remove Taijutsu as a requirement, as it's listed in the skills section already.

_________________
Spoiler:
 






"Death comes for everyone. I'm just moving you to the front of the line."
Back to top Go down
Blonde
Chuunin
avatar

Posts : 109
Join date : 2017-11-15

Character File
Skills & Elements: Raiton, Chemistry
Class: C
Ryo: 8,700

PostSubject: Re: Brute Fist   Tue Nov 21, 2017 5:21 pm

the description's actually inaccurate 'cause originally it was going to be a stealth fighting style. but i just changed it to basically being based on trying to quickly knock someone down for the count. if i change it and possibly the name (depending on if i can find one and a kanji translation to it) would it be fine?

_________________

"If you're doing something for people you care about, then it doesn't matter how hard it is!"
Updates | App
Spoiler:
 
Back to top Go down
Tsuyo

avatar

Posts : 480
Join date : 2016-12-15

Character File
Skills & Elements: None
Class: E
Ryo:

PostSubject: Re: Brute Fist   Thu Nov 23, 2017 11:32 am

The style itself I don't have an issue with, I only had an issue with the description being a bit odd as well as my other concerns. As long as those are addressed and edited, you should be fine.

_________________
Spoiler:
 






"Death comes for everyone. I'm just moving you to the front of the line."
Back to top Go down
Blonde
Chuunin
avatar

Posts : 109
Join date : 2017-11-15

Character File
Skills & Elements: Raiton, Chemistry
Class: C
Ryo: 8,700

PostSubject: Re: Brute Fist   Thu Dec 07, 2017 2:44 pm

Tweaked this awhile ago but forgot to mention it-

_________________

"If you're doing something for people you care about, then it doesn't matter how hard it is!"
Updates | App
Spoiler:
 
Back to top Go down
Tsuyo

avatar

Posts : 480
Join date : 2016-12-15

Character File
Skills & Elements: None
Class: E
Ryo:

PostSubject: Re: Brute Fist   Thu Dec 07, 2017 4:57 pm

Quote :
Name: Chikushou no Ken [畜生拳 lit. Brute Fist]
Rank: C
Power: C
Activation Cost: N/A
Upkeep Cost: 3
Range: Self
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Taijutsu
Classification: Kirigakure Exclusive Style
Requirements: Taijutsu skill, D-Rank in Coordination & Speed
Parent Technique: N/A
Hand Seals: N/A
Description: This fighting style focuses on exploiting the target's weak spots, and attacking with raw power and speed. The style is occasionally used in tandem with Ninjutsu created to be befitting of it. This fighting style boosts the user's Strength by ++ and their Speed by a +.
Weaknesses: If an opponent has countermethods to the especially-pinpoint fighting style, it's fairly difficult to pull off within combat.



Approved

_________________
Spoiler:
 






"Death comes for everyone. I'm just moving you to the front of the line."
Back to top Go down
Tsuyo

avatar

Posts : 480
Join date : 2016-12-15

Character File
Skills & Elements: None
Class: E
Ryo:

PostSubject: Re: Brute Fist   Fri Dec 15, 2017 8:50 pm

Quote :
Name: Quick Step
Rank: D
Power: D
Activation Cost: 3
Upkeep Cost: N/A
Range: Self
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Taijutsu
Classification: Chikushou no Ken
Requirements: N/A
Parent Technique: N/A
Hand Seals: Chikushou no Ken
Description: More or less a technique used for supplementary means, the Quick Step sticks true to its name. Through the combined use of the Surface Walking technique, albeit in a unique use, and proper positioning of their foot, the user is able to capitalize on the flow of chakra to their sole, using it as a means to propel themselves forward in a quick burst, simultaneously kicking off with the foot they've just lifted the heel of, for a brief propulsion. ++ to Speed for the duration.
Weaknesses: N/A


This sounds like Ninjutsu that gives a quick burst to speed for one step. That's fine, and you can reduce cost to 1 per step once you change the tag to also include Ninjutsu. Also, Brute Fist does not belong in Classification. It belongs in Parent Technique. Classification is whether it's personal, open to a village, open to all, etc.

Quote :
Name: Mirage Step
Rank: C
Power: C
Activation Cost: 5
Upkeep Cost: N/A
Range: Self
Speed: -
Element: -
Skill: Taijutsu
Classification: Chikushou no Ken
Requirements: N/A
Parent Technique: Chikushou no Ken, Clone Technique
Hand Seals: Ram → Snake → Tiger
Description: After forming the handseals pertaining to the Clone Technique, the user amps it up. Whether sprinting, jogging or even sauntering, they employ the academy technique in the form of a consistent trail of afterimages behind them, mirroring the movements preceding their current. When used by someone with incredible speed, the technique becomes especially effective, as they can cloak themselves in a consistent "stream" of afterimages. This technique produces 10 afterimages for every tier of Coordination beyond D-Rank.
Weaknesses: Easily distinguishable with doujutsu or sensory.

This also sounds like a ninjutsu, as you're using a ninjutsu in the technique. I don't really see any taijutsu used in this at all, really, so the taijutsu tag needs removed and replaced with a Ninjutsu tag. Classification needs fixed similar to above, too. If the rest are like this, they'll need fixed as well.

How long do these afterimages last? One post? Only for a moment? What are these afterimages capable of while they exist? Basing the scale of the afterimages on Coordination makes little sense to me. It has little to nothing to do with using chakra to make afterimages. I'd prefer to see a flat cost for a flat amount of afterimages. I'd say 3 points per five afterimages would be okay. And lastly, due to this being a lower ranking ninjutsu as well as how it functions, if the opponent can track your movements then they'd be able to tell which is the real one and which one isn't.

_________________
Spoiler:
 






"Death comes for everyone. I'm just moving you to the front of the line."
Back to top Go down
Blonde
Chuunin
avatar

Posts : 109
Join date : 2017-11-15

Character File
Skills & Elements: Raiton, Chemistry
Class: C
Ryo: 8,700

PostSubject: Re: Brute Fist   Tue Dec 26, 2017 5:58 pm

Made the changes to Quick Step and Mirage Step. All the afterimages can really do is mirror the previous movements that the user made while they were in the position that the afterimage was created.

Basically if the user is punching the air but moves from the spot that they did it, the afterimage created in that spot would be punching the air, with the ones after that would be retracting their arm, assuming the user doesn't keep their arm out after the fact. They also last for the post that they're created, so in their next post the afterimages'll fade.

_________________

"If you're doing something for people you care about, then it doesn't matter how hard it is!"
Updates | App
Spoiler:
 
Back to top Go down
Izumi
Admin
avatar

Posts : 557
Join date : 2012-05-28

Character File
Skills & Elements: All
Class: X
Ryo: All of It

PostSubject: Re: Brute Fist   Fri Dec 29, 2017 10:10 am

@Blonde wrote:
Spoiler:
 
These two are Approved.

Nail Claw Transmutation- This is Ninjutsu. Are the nails as durable as steel? How long do they last? If you don't set a short duration for them, you'll need an upkeep, and that upkeep will need to be higher depending on how tough you want these nails to be. A rough description of their size would be nice. I'm imagining something similar to Yugito's adamantine claw technique, but even the size of One Tail Naruto's nails would be effective as well.


Tearing Tempest- This is a combined use of Soft Body and Nail Claw, but it doesn't do anything on its own that a technique might require. You could do this without the jutsu and save yourself some stamina in the process. Alternatively, you could take one of the moves described, like the buzz saw maneuver, add some detail to it and give it a stat boost.

Stifled Executioner- This is Ninjutsu. I actually think it's fine as is, since the cost is considerably higher than Silent Killing and it doesn't offer the tracking ability, but you'll need to get Tsuyo's approval on this one, as it's close to one of her Exclusives.

Falsified Death- With the drawbacks you propose, the cost and rank on this could easily be dropped to C-Rank (5 points). You have to be in a good position to use this at all and even at that point it's an alternative to an easy kill, or just keeping them unconscious. I do need some specifics. Is this like a standard knockout or does it have a longer duration? Does it last indefinitely if the needles are left in place?

Wrath of the Demon- Looks fine, except the numbing function. That is generally determined by your Constitution, and since this tech boost Con, it'll contribute towards that, but having its own separate pain reducing function is overstepping by a hair. You could increase the upkeep cost in order to have your Con increase again for the sole purpose of pain resistance -this'll be cheaper than a standard boost because it's only one aspect of a multi-faceted stat. For complete pain ignorance/numbing, though, some cost will have to increase by quite a bit. This is also Ninjutsu, or I guess it could be classified as a General Skill.
Back to top Go down
http://gladiusrp.forumotion.com
Sponsored content




PostSubject: Re: Brute Fist   

Back to top Go down
 
Brute Fist
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
-
» A Fist Full of Dice!
» I TRIED TO TELL YOU!!! (fire fist teir one disscusion)
» Ruby's stuff, I guess [Requests are closed.]
» The Grand Army of The Knights Of Sigmar's Righteous Fury
» Drunken Master [1978]

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Gladius :: Registration :: Technique Registration-
Jump to: